Mundanity.

So.
I have been hit with the realization that I should enjoy my days as a student, because when I start working I will not be able to do all the things I want to.

Also I have been suffering from writer's block recently. Can't write a single song without throwing my guitar on the floor and walking off in huff.
Dunno if it's a mental block or I'm just losing my mojo.

Anyway life's been pretty dreary so far, yes, several sightings of cute guys but none with which I can see a future happening (I am pretty far-sighted, indeed).

Hope you all are having a more interesting week than I am.


shall I post a picture depicting my life right now?

yes, i guess I shall.
Interpret freely, children.

not enough.

Hahaha surprisingly, i feel like Facebook isnt enough.
It doesnt connect me enough.
I dont know what else to do with my time online.
Should i not go online and find other things to do?
I go online out of habit.
But is there something else i could be doing other than surfing the Internet?
Since all i ever do is MSN, Skype, FAcebook, check my email, update my Looklet, and sometimes watch Youtube videos and look through some cooking blogs...
usually i have dramas/animes/movies i want to watch, but somehow now i think ive watched enough.

time to read a book (ironically, since the only reason i was looking forward to midsem break was so i could NOT read text... lol)
anyhow, reading a textbook vs reading a storybook,,,there's a great difference between the two.

Love? meh.

Yes, this is coming from the TRES single person.
=D single all my life and not regretting it so far.
I mean how can you regret being single right.
Apparently when you fall in love it gets even better!!
Sure sure.
I believe that, truly I do.
Though i must say, I am a genius for being able to write cheesy love songs eventhough I havent truly fallen in love before.
Unless you count my Oguri Shun, Kpop bands, and Mizushima Hiro crushes as my past love r/s.. which i dont think you can because it was purely and obviously unrequited love.
hee.
BUT MANN I LOVE MIZU.
neways.

It's so tiring to watch what I eat everyday. I have to think like "ooh cant eat too much carbo" or "oo this has too much sugar". SO ANNOYING. GEEZ.
DONT CARE LA OKAY IMMA EAT WHATEVER I WANT AND GROW FAT.
WHATS UR PROBLEM.
STUPID CALORIE COUNT.
guhhhh. its either that or i have to start exercising which i dont plan to do because its COLD OUTSIDE and i already WALK TO UNI AND BACK which in total is about 1 hour and SOOOOO BORING.
i like walking i do, just not EVERYDAY.
BLOOOOOOOODY BLOOOD!
yeah blood is bloody.
anyhoos, I guess i will be exercising more often now. -_- half an hour everyday.
horridness.
thts if i want to be able to eat whatever i want.
its either that or i starve myself to death, and become a stick and wear guy clothes.
ohhh heee heeeh eeee.

MAN I WANNA SHUT MYSELF AWAY FROM THE WORLD AND JUST WATCH DRAMAS AND ANIMES AND MOVIES ETO MY HEART'S CONTENT.
how nice it is to not have to socialize.
how nice.


PEOPLE ARE TIRING ME OUT.
MAN. IM A PEOPLE PERSON AND IM SAYING THAT.
SSSSSIENNN GILER.

okay u know what i think a bit of ranting in this blog is called for.
THIS MAKES ME FEEL SO GOOD. =D just typing out what i feel INSAIIIDDDE!!
okay i realise this makes me sound really pathetic and whatnot but oh hey!! surprise, surprise.
nobody cares!! !!! !!!!!!!

OOOO LAAA LALALALALA. TALALLALA.


miao cat miao woof dog woof moo cow moooo. let's seeeeeee.....

if only i had the money i would take up kickboxing and whoop everyone's .... derriere!! =D
i really really want to learn some kind of physical combat la. i need to destress by hitting something... drums would be good too. or the bass. or like.... DANCE. hip hop please no bootay shaking and hip swaying kpop girl dance stuff, i no sexy to do that.

mmm.
eh i like cereal.
mmm. i should bath now everyone is asleep and its 1:33 a.m.
its just...
i havent blogged for so lonG!!!! AND ITS SO NICE TO TYPE CRAP THAT ONLY I WILL BE READING!!! GAAAHHHHH


anyway

Oh Dear Youth.

Oh Dear Youth,
Where hast thou gone?

Indeed, I look back fondly at the past, with nothing but the yearning to turn back time and the feeling of wistfulness.

okay scratch that.
Ever since i reached 15 ive been wanting to be 5 YO. -_-

trollll.


University is pretty much the bomb.
in a bad way. literally. Like a bomb.
And i hate how i get so emo. Last time my emo-ness never lasted long.
Anyway im going to be real random and rant all i want.
hey.
this is my blog okay.
my personal public place on the internet.
i can do wtv i want on it so bugger off if you dont like reading my posts. heh.



SO RIGHT.
omgosh lor. seriously what is with him? it's like he gets along well with everyone other than me. Ive never even done anything to him before. he acts like im not there, he makes it clear that he communicates well with everyone and wants to talk to everyone but me.

WELL, GOOD JOB.

as you can see, i am restraining myself from cursing. I always do it in my head but im trying not to make it a habit because sooner or later it will come out of the mouth and i dont want that happening.

I dont know what the HAY his problem is but if he is going to continue to be like that, I will..... PRAY FOR HIM.
HAH!
STUPID DEVIL, U CANT GET AWAY WITH THIS. HAHAHHAHA



So anyway, work is stressing me out because i have no idea whats going on at least 100% of the time. (at least being an understatement)
but hopefully after this weekend which i officially name "Enlightening Weekend" - as they say, children always live up to their names, im thinking this counts for weekends as well- though i doubt id be able to "up" my knowledge level in about two days.

WELL HEY HEY HEY NOW, nothing is impossible!

And about my CF, Im thinking of not going for it for a while, because I feel like im not integrating and not needed as a PERSON, but rather just for the numbers. It's like im not appreciated there. and EVERYONE wants to be appreciated (no matter how much you try to deny it, everyone deep down inside yearns acceptance. EVen the non-conformists seek acceptance amongst each other, no?). Meanwhile I will find my niche and my role elsewhere.
Since everyone there can get along just fine without me,I see no reason for my being there.
CF-hopping begin!
=D


I feel no shame, even.
It's not like im skipping it though, its more like Im venturing out and visiting other CFs to see what they have to offer me.
Meanwhile id better make sure I do my QT consistently..... eeep.

Im still trying to figure out what is the most conducive atmosphere for me to study.
hmmm.

also i think id better stop buying clothes and stuff.
nahh. haahha! clothes here are too nice. and im planning to buy heels!! =D eventhough i prolly wont wear them, its just nice to have heels available in YOUR SIZE and not one size SMALLER because they ran out of FREAKING STOCK.
SEriously Malaysia, be more considerate of the bigger sized people who are born in your country, and dont sell everything in XXS, you have no appreciation for the variety and diversity of human beings.

boo you


neways. I have to wake up in 4 hours.
Dont know why im still awake.
im always awake when its not necessary.
geez SARAH.
GOOD JOB.



GOOD JOB.

anyway.

Big Words Part 2

Cognitive :
Def: of or pertaining to the mental processes of perception, memory, judgment, and reasoning, as contrasted with emotional and volitional processes.


Epistemological:
Def: The branch of philosophy that studies the nature of knowledge, its presuppositions and foundations, and its extent and validity.

Inaugurate:
def: To induct into office by a formal ceremony.


Coup d'etat:

def: The sudden overthrow of a government by a usually small group of persons in or previously in positions of authority.


fait accompli:
def: An accomplished, presumably irreversible deed or fact.

De facto:

usurpation:


seceded:

municipal:

repudiated:

ab initio:


tacit:

interim:

Big Words Part 1

Introducing my HOPEFULLY consistent posts about words I don't usually use in daily life. Haha.
Let us begin.

Positivism -
Def: A doctrine contending that sense perceptions are the only admissible basis of human knowledge and precise thought.
How to use: The concept of positivism was much contended by many philosophers in law, especially those that believed that law was originally created by God.

Axiomatic -
Def: obvious and not needing to be proved; self-evident and unquestionable
How to use: It is axiomatic that English teachers themselves should know enough about how to use grammar effectively before they can be deemed as capable of teaching children.

Coercive -
Def: (from coerce) To force to act or think in a certain way by use of pressure, threats, or intimidation.
How to use: People who use coercive force to gain followers are not fit to be called a leader.

Presupposed -
Def: Tacitly assume at the beginning of a line of argument or course of action that something is the case
How to use: In this course, it is presupposed that people who enrolled would have a basic knowledge of the tea ceremony and its history.




OKAY THAT'S ALL FOR NOW.
whew just four new words is making me feel dizzy gahha



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Duddeeeee

Exams on the horizon.. no in fact, its around the corner...
no IN FACT, its tmr.
=(
why am i online!
I HATE THE INTERNET SOMETIMES, it's so distracting. i wish i could mug and absorb like some kinda sponge from outer universe. bleoogaefgiafiaomk.
anyway. I thought I was being pretty up to date with my studies this semester but i think i mdoing it the wrong way if i dont even rmbr what my notes were about... -_- time for an overhaul of studying habits and methods..
next sem imma try something new.
like... doing class preparation one week before class. and then reviewing? (probably iwll never have time for that. so okay no reviewing) and spending heaps n heaps of time on the readings, just as long as i understand it, its okay if im slow.

(darn it i can foresee a future of no social life for me next sem)
but this i sthe only sem with five subjects so im cool.
besides i have two days off each week next sem
i could work part time on one day n the other day (friday) i can bum around since my sundays are used to study at the ASB with friends.
yeahhhh

okay u know what, i actually shud be focusing on how to pass my exams FIRST before dayfreaming and planning for the future.



ugh.


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vocab

finesse??? SCATHING???? SOMETIMES I DONT KNOW WHERE THESE WORDS COME FROM!


D=

when I eat fusion food, my english just gets weird. i use words i dont usually use, and words i didnt know i was capable of using.


ew i smell mosquito spray. D=

time to flee this horrible smellllllllll

Is it just me?

People grow apart. It's just the way it is.

There was a time when I lived in a fairytale. "BEST FRIENDS FOREVER!" I said, really meaning it. I even thought it'd carry through. With all my heart, I wanted for it to last. But it ended. We grew apart, went our separate ways.
No bitter feelings. Just the slightly awkward atmosphere when we accidentally meet, having that awareness of how much we've missed out on each others' lives and how close we used to be.

Why does it happen?
What makes it happen?
Life, apparently.

This doesnt mean that I foresee the ending of any friendship I start. I just reluctantly know somewhere at the back of my mind, that there will be a time when we can no longer be how we used to be. So all I can do is cherish what we have here and now, and hope for the best. I may not be an optimist, but I see the best in everything only when it is worth it. I am aware of the possible future disappointments, but I do not see it as predetermined.

Sometimes, that is all we have left to hold on to. =)

Random interjection: When did my posts EVER get so wordy and....intense? GEEZ. GONE ARE THE DAYS WHEN ALL I USED TO POST ABOUT WAS FLYING PIGS AND GRAZING COWS. Sigh. I miss those days. But trust me, they're probably around corner. I can never stay down too long. What's got me worried is the LENGTH of the time I can stay my depressed and withdrawn self before I finally return to happy ol' me. I think this is where I pick up the Bible and start doing some REAL reading. =/ Oh help me, Lord.


Anyway. Ive just lost any motivation I earlier had to drone on about life and its mishaps and its misfortunes. Sometimes it just gets too depressing. It's CHRISTMAS FOR GOODNESS' SAKES. LIGHTEN UP. (sorry, talking to myself) So yeah.

And sometimes I cant understand why church groups have cliques. I know there's this thing where some people click better with some than they do with others but do they SERIOUSLY have to shove it in everyone's faces by posting it on my Facebook wall complete with sickeningly cliche captions?! Come ONNNNNN.


sometimes.

just SOMETIMES.
I'd like to wring a chicken's neck and then cut it off and then roast it in pure anger sauce and garnish it with furious herbs and serve it on an impassioned plate.




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MERRY CHRISTMAS TO YOU TOO.

One Serving of Pessimism, Please.

I'd never thought I'd change.
But Ive come to realize that, well, I''ve changed. O.O
Come to think of it, Ive just become an exaggerated version of myself back in secondary school days.

The only difference is that now I have one more characteristic to add to myself.
Im rather pessimistic now.
Funny thing is, pessimistic not to others, but only about myself.

I think life is full of disappointments and unfairness.
I think love is stupid and a waste of time.
I think friendship is fake and unreliable.

While you may think I sound like a TOTAL wet blanket, you should try thinking through every single one of the statements Ive just said. Surely you've been at a stage in your life when you thought the very same. I didnt ask to be like this. I started off as an optimistic person, but as you get older, things get more complicated. People of this world corrupt your child-like mind, challenge your faith, look down on your beliefs. You become more guarded and wary, less open-minded and trusting. The world does these kind of things to you.

Before you start to reprimand me for only adding to the despair in the world, let me tell you why it is better being pessimistic. First off:
1. You are less likely to get disappointed. - and when you are less likely to get disappointed, you actually become a happier person. When you have all that negative mentality in your life, when something good comes your way, you tend to appreciate it more. On the other hand, if you were brimming over with optimism and troubles and struggles came your way, you would most likely be wearied and depressed because these obstacles seem major to you, when to a pessimistic person it would be a normal thing.

Secondly:
2. You think more rationally. -Rather than being up in the clouds, always hoping and wishing for the best, being pessimistic actually brings you down to earth and plants your feet on the ground. You rationalize. You think logically. You dont set up for yourself an idealistic playground world where unicorns play and rainbows are found everyday. You tend to think more carefully, and learn how to prepare yourself for foreseeable situations. Hence, you are better off in life. If you just take everything as it goes and have a happy-go-lucky attitude, you will be unprepared for the hits and disappointments you will face in the future, and trust me, life is full of those.

Thirdly:
3. Being pessimistic does not mean you have to look like Scrooge. Nor does it mean you have to go around dissing everyone's hopes and dreams. See, that's just a stereotype. A pessimistic person can still be happy. A pessimistic person can still laugh and play. Let's just say we're probably a bit more stable and firm-minded then optimists. No offense.


So yeah. Just a little (or not so little) blather and a rather serious-toned post on why pessimists > optimists. Sadly for us, optimists are liked better, probably because some people think their overly bright and cheery attitudes could rub off them if they stayed close for long enough.
pish-posh.




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